Embrace the Journey: Is it MS or Aging?

S

Walking independently - before

I'm frustrated so I call out MS

We seem to have a tit-for-tat relationship. Your main thing is to trip me up. I on the other hand rant, rave and plot to keep you in hiding. Just when I started feeling really good in my gait, sure footed and relaxed, you decided I needed to be given a good dose of humility. I’m just guessing that ’s why you threw me a zinger. On the other hand, maybe I was wrong giving you all the credit. Is aging trying to get in on your action? What do you think?

MS responds 

Calm down. I mean no harm. Do you get hurt when I throw in those zingers? Sure, aging handicaps recovery time, but to give aging credit or blame seems to be a stretch. Age also likes to zap your energy. Right? Do you bounce back with the same zest and confidence you use to? Way back, twenty years ago, aging wasn’t so much an issue. When I first started messing with your psyche, you tried to ignore me. My goodness, we’ve been through a lot together!  

Working on balance and agility

Yes, and it’s not all been good. To this day you are on my mind, sun-up to sun-down. When I’m walking, working around the house, exercising, you are always there. My goal has always been to minimize your effect on me. The first fourteen years, I learned to live with you, but lost ground in terms of your effect on me.  Now, since I know I have the Primary Progressive form of MS, people say,“You’re doing great! You’re suppose to be getting worse, right?” I say, “No, I can do better.”

Lost my grip on a full quart jar

You and aging both seem to enjoy attacking muscle strength slowly,  at a snail’s pace. All of a sudden, a muscle group doesn’t function like it use to. For example,  recently I noticed my grip is too weak to open jars! Handling heavy objects is a big problem. Recently,  I dropped a full quart jar of juice on my foot. That really hurt. Was that you or Aging? I think you also play equal roles in cognitive decline. Losing my mind is the scariest. Anyway, I work hard to minimize both physical and cognitive decline.

I guess you’re right, but I had not thought about us having much in common. As you age you are suppose to have issues with balance  and you are supposed to lose muscle mass. 

Hot Yoga  outing in Laguna Beach, CA

No, MS, you exacerbate everything! I have friends in their nineties who are doing incredible physical things. They still travel the world, ride elephants and skydive. Not me. My goals are basic: keep moving and feel good. 

Just to do that, I need lots of people. 

To your credit, doing that hot  yoga, really slowed me down. I think you might be in a wheel chair or using a walker now if not for that therapy. I lost traction on those physiological issues like frequent headaches and constipation and excess gas. I can see you are happier now. I really hate to give hot yoga so much credit, but they did minimize spasticity and joint stiffness.  I think that was the tipping point allowing your walking to improve. 

You ganged up on me with all those therapy people. One treatment at the time, you cut me out. I had to up my game. All I have left is playing with your walking and messing with your mind. Right?

Incentives! Loleh and little brother 

MS, you are too much! NO, NO, NO! I won't let you mess with my mind! Absolutely, I have ganged up on you. Now, Donnie and I are double teaming you. We have a plan to increase my walking confidence by improving my gait even more. For example, we know that I’m more vulnerable to your evil ways when I’m fatigued, distracted, or going to fast. I’m using all my tools intentionally to regain independent walking. It’s coming back.

I know that my reality is living with Primary Progressive MS. I figure that I am probably more prone to the effects of aging than other people my age. On the other hand, the same therapies and interventions I use to manage MS are reported to also slow down aging. Best I can tell, I’m in a win - win situation. I’ll keep  doing what has been working.

Embrace Your Destiny: Hard Work Pays Off

Working at the big cable machine

I have been working with a trainer at Gold's Gym for fourteen months. Lacey Blanton worked with me thirteen of those months on my goals of strengthening core,  posture and of course, walking. She has passed me on to another trainer who she says can take me to the next level.
Evan Camboy is my new trainer. In my first session, he began by  analyzing what I can do to determine where we needed to begin. Not surprisingly he identified the same issues of abduction, core strength, and leg strength that Lacey had been concentrating on. 

Embrace Your Destiny: Little Bit by Little Bit

Change happens little bit by little bit. It's easy to get discouraged with what seems to be lack of progress, with anything we do. Spasticity slows me down doing anything. For example, I have noticed very slow improvement in my piano playing. I've been taking lessons and practicing everyday for three and a half years. Practice is the key for me.  Everyday and over a L...O...N.NNNNNG period of time, I can finally see some small, but significant changes. I see the same thing in hot yoga practice, speaking at Toastmasters, walking, and building strength.

Embrace Your Destiny: Knowledge is Power

Speaking at Toastmasters

I was looking forward to retiring at 55 being healthy, active, and able to do most anything I wanted to do. When I started falling, losing my balance, dragging my right foot and stumbling a lot, I got concerned. What a surprise to be diagnosed with MS at age 50! I argued with my doctor that I was just too old for that disease. Well, after I calmed down and digested the facts he presented, I concluded that Multiple Sclerosis is not good. On the other hand he said it can be managed by me. Okay, I can do that. I set my goal to go after this disease with all the knowledge and positive will power I could muster and see what happens. I knew I could count on my family, my doctor, my colleagues at work and my church family as a strong support system. The rest was up to me.

It's been seventeen years now since I was diagnosed. In the beginning fatigue, pain, stiffness and spasticity and headaches were the norm. My walking was limited to short walks with very jerky motion. Now, I have great energy and vitality. My walking is almost a regular gait. I have eliminated my headache medicine and another medicine for movement. I would say I feel great 98% of the time. So what's the change? That's what this blog is about. 

Over 17 years, I've learned a lot about the disease and about me. My job now is managing me. I embrace the challenge of trying things that are safe, recommended for neurological diseases and especially MS, and fun. I will share what I've learned over time that has worked for me. I will also share my current adventures into some of the new alternative therapies I use for managing myself. Please join me and share your comments, and questions. The destiny begins with drug therapy which is the first big hurdle and decision.